Kind and Severe

I meant to do some errands last night and had been reading the bible most of the afternoon. I was creating the Sunday School lesson to send out to teachers and I became so enchanted with the words before me. They leapt off of the page and were filled with passion, wisdom, and heart...I felt like they were alive...and I actually believe that His word is.

I began driving down PCH, because I felt the Spirit leading me to do so. I passed a "beach access" sign on Broad Beach I'd never seen before. I did a U-Turn and saw D'Amores and decided that it was a good day for a slice of their pizza and I took it to the ocean and sat with it.

It was about an hour before sun down and I hadn't realized how much I needed to be still. I needed to sit and just "be". A lot of my living with Jesus feels like "doing" and I sense that God is urging me to see that less of this "doing" and more "being" with Him is what He desires for our relationship.

I sat and contemplated so many things. The intimacy with my God was so rich and deep it'd cheapen it to share it with you. I will tell you that i pondered the edges of the ocean. THey were curling into beautiful waves and no wave was the same as the one before. The ocean would swell differently...the water broke in these beautiful curling and powerful waves. It struck me that God is so infinite and wounderful like the ocean. He is dynamic and strong and full of passion. I saw a verse in Romans 11 yesterday that said "Notice that the Lord is both kind and severe" I found the ocean last night to be an alegory to this truth. The ocean is a deep and wonderful home to so many, but it is severe and powerful.

I thought also about how God being so powerful is important to me. If God was indifferent and not both kind and severe I would not find Him to be loving. Have you witnessed those parents who don't care? It is so frustrating because their indifference is so close to distain. It seems to me so clear that the justice of God is so directly necessary to the love of God...even if that Justice reigns over me too. I want a God that opposes the sin in the world that is so broken and ugly. I love that He will be angry for the things that aren't right in this world...and perhaps also in me.

I find this both unsettling and comforting. As I read through Romans 8 yesterday, I noticed the parts that were severe. I think I often notice the kind parts of the bible. I like them better. Yesterday I noticed what was severe, and i felt convicted and frustrated and called to a higher living. Noticing only the kind parts seems easier...but it does not bring about justice.

Justice has to start in my heart. I have to be willing to take all of what God is calling me to be and then also come to Him for the mercy He offers me when I can not live it all.

Seems the cross looses it's depth and dynamic beauty when all we do is worry about how to be nice. Love isn't just being nice...love is both severe and kind.

Comments

[Hugo]

My greatest disconnect with this comes with Psalm 139 -- hardly anyone reads it to the end, because there's this shift two-thirds through that is so angry and inexplicable in the light of what came before... and yet, God invites us to bring him our anger and our need for justice rather than a quick glossing over of real pain...